On a rainy Friday, I’m curled up in bed, not exactly sure where to take my toddler this morning. He’s been up since 4:30am but who is counting, right? He’s playing at the moment with my husband but checks in on me every 10-15 minutes to make sure I’m up.
I can be miserable this morning about my exhaustion and this whole scenario or I can accept this moment and just chuckle. Sleep is overrated really, I’m telling myself.
Aside from these little inconveniences, life is pretty good. I must remind myself, that I feel so lucky to be alive. A friend of mine is fighting for her life. She is a mom of a five-year-old boy and has stage four cancer. It started as breast cancer a few years ago and after a full mastectomy and chemotherapy, she was in remission. But two years later, cancer resurfaced in her lungs. Her cancer is considered to be triple negative which means it’s hard to treat and immune to most chemotherapies. Right now she’s trying to get into trials, where they test new treatments on her but so far she hasn’t had luck.
She’s an amazing person and mom. Loving, strong, sweet, positive and good-hearted. She is an incredible photographer and took family portraits for us a few times.
It’s so hard to know what to say to her when I see her. Every time I open my mouth and talk to her, I think, “That was a dumb thing to say!” Or, “That must of sounded so insensitive.” Like the time I saw her at a cafe and told her about my spa weekend and how it flew by too fast. Then I realized that she must be more concerned with her life flying by too fast.
Yes, in a way we are all dying. We all have a limited time on this earth, and how can we make the best of it? Or how can we just sit back and enjoy it? How can that be a hard task for so many.
Last week, I came across an article about a young woman in her late twenties named Holly Butcher who died of a rare bone cancer. She left the most amazing letter to her family with advice on living.
First, she writes, “I always imagined myself growing old, wrinkled and grey- most likely caused by the beautiful family (lots of kiddies) I planned on building with the love of my life. I want that so bad it hurts. That’s the thing about life; It is fragile, precious and unpredictable and each day is a gift, not a given right.”
To summarize she said:
- Be grateful for your work instead of complaining. Work and exercise are trivial things until your body won’t allow you to do them.
- Appreciate your health and body, even if you’re not your ideal size. Don’t obsess over that.
- Use your money on experiences instead of “material shit”.
- Don’t live your life in your screens. Appreciate the moment and stop trying to capturing it for everyone else with your phone.
- Do what makes your heart feel happy.
I’m getting out of bed now and will make some coffee. Then I’ll hug my husband and child, tell them I love them, and really mean it. Sleep or no sleep, this day is so darn precious.